Monday, October 12, 2009

Santa Banta Jokes Series No 16


Santa to Banta : "12 bananas are put in front of an elephant...but the elephant eats only 11 ...why...?"
Banta: "Hmmm... Uska Pet bhar gaya tha??"
Santa: " No"
Banta: Usko taste pasand nahi aaya??"
Santa: " No"
Banta " To fir tu hi bata"
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Santa: "Becoz one of them was a plastic banana..!"


Santa: " This time again 12 bananas are put in front of an elephant..but this time it eats none..why...??"
Banta: " Dont know"
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Santa: "This time it was a plastic elephant..ha ha..!!

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Deadly PJ Humor,


This PJ was submitted to us by Hitesh Sao from Orrisa..

one fine day ..Takhur Veer Pratap Singh was relaxing in his ancestral haweli..the haweli
was full of antique items, golden swords, precious stones and all damn costly stuff!!
in front of him was a big tijori ...full of gold and money...

suddenly two thieves got in. One started stealing all the antique items and the other started opening the tijori ..that too in front of veer Pratap singh who was very awake and was also watching the men steal all his property.. he was very healthy..and also not physically handicapped ..yet he didnt stop the thieves..why...?????????????

soochoooo....
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.use ur kidneys..
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ok ..i will tell u the answer...

Thakur Veer Pratap Singh is a 6 month old baby ..now how can he...??

PS: You may submit your joke by following this link:SUBMIT YOUR JOKE COMPETITION

SantaBanta Joke Series No 15


Santa Singh visits Sherlock Holmes one fine day.
As soon as Santa enters, Holmes says, "Santa Singh, today you are wearing a red colored underwear".

Santa Singh: "Fantabulous. Tremendous. You have once again proven your gift in deductive reasoning. Now, if you may, please tell me how you deduced it."

Holmes said...
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"You forgot to zip your pants"

Thursday, October 8, 2009

NRI Jokes


As we all know, having your mother-in-law in your home is any man's worst nightmare. But the Poor Jokes team has come to know that NRI's living in a particular US state are compelled by Federal regulations, to bring their mother-in-laws from India to stay with them. Can you name the state?
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Texas (Take- सास) !!

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Wife Jokes

If Columbus had been married, he might never have discovered America, because he would have had to answer all the following questions:

  • Where are you going?
  • With whom?
  • Why?
  • How are you going?
  • To discove r what?
  • Why only you?
  • What do I do when you are not here?
  • Can I come with you?
  • When will you be back?
  • Dinner ghar par hi khaoge?
  • Mere liye kya laoge?
  • You deliberately made this plan without me, didn’t you?
  • You seem to be making a lot of these programs lately...
  • Answer me – why?
  • I want to go to my mother’s house.
  • I want you to drop me there.
  • I don’t want to come back – ever!
  • What do you mean, OK?
  • Why aren’t you stopping me?
  • I don’t understand what this whole ‘discovery’ thing is about.
  • You always do things like this.
  • Last time you also did the same thing!
  • Nowadays you always seem to do this kind of stuff.
  • I still don’t understand what else is left to be discovered!

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Bollywood PJ No. 19

Poor Jokes News Desk brings to you another scoop from Bollywood.

We have been reliably informed that legendary vamp of yesteryear Helen is planning to make a comeback.

This time she will play the lead role in a movie.

The title of the movie is "Re-vamp" !!

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Sweet Poor Joke in Hindi


Hey Guys,
Do you know how to make Sugar Dance????
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Dont Know???
Its simple.. Just put focus some light on the sugar and it shall start dancing!!!!!
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Still Confused??
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Ok!! I will tell you!!!!!!!
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After you put some light on Sugar It will be come "Chinni Prakash"

Santa Banta Jokes Series No 15


Hi Guys.
Here is the latest
Santa Banta
Poor Joke
in Cartoon.
Please Read On..







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Santa Banta Jokes Series No 19


Hi Guys. Here is the latest Santa Banta Joke in Cartoon.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Submit Your Joke Contest September Winners!!!!


Dear Readers,

After the raging success of Submit Your Joke Contest August We hereby announce the winners of the Submit Your Joke Contest September Month. We would also like to remind all our readers that the contest is open till the month of December!! Winners each month shall win a Cash Prize of Rs 1000!!!!


The stats of this months entries are as follows:
Total number of Participants : 48.
Total number of Entries: 81



The winner this Month is Mr Ranhu Mohanty from Bhubaneshwar Orrisa. He wins a cool 1000 Rs Cash from our kitty.



The Award Winning Joke from Mr Ranhu Mohanty is as follows:

Happy Married Life Story

Once upon a time Santa Singh and his wife celebrated their 25th marriage anniversary.
They had become famous in the city for not having a single conflict in their period of 25 years.

Local newspaper editors had gathered at the occasion to find out the secret of their well known "happy going marriage".
Editor: "Sir. It's amazingly unbelievable. How did you make this possible?
Santa Singh recalled his old honeymoon days said:

"We had been to Shimla for honeymoon after marriage.
Having selected the horse riding finally, we both started the ride on different horses.

My horse was pretty okay but the horse on which my wife was riding seemed to be a crazy one.

On the way ahead, that horse jumped suddenly, making my wife topple over.
Recovering her position from the ground, she patted the horse's back and said "This is your first time".

She again climbed the horse and continued with the ride. After a while, it happened again.
This time she again kept calm and said "This is your second time" and continued.

When the horse dropped her third time, she silently took out the revolver from the purse and shot the horse dead !!
I shouted at my wife: "What did you do you psycho. You killed the poor animal. Are you crazy?" ..

She gave a silent look and said: "This is your first time!!!"."
Santa Singh: "That's it. We are happy ever after." "







Itane khatarnaak PJ ke liye ham Ranhu Mohanty ko Daad-Khaaj-Khujli deta hai!! :-)

We would like to remind that the contest is open till December 2009. You may submit your jokes/PJ/Poor Jokes/ SMS Jokes/ Hilarious Jokes (whatever you may call them) on this link SUBMIT YOUR JOKE COMPETITION

PS:Last month we had published the other Worth Reading Jokes from our contestants in one post itself. However this month onwards they shall be published randomly in between the month!!

Gujju Jokes 4


Here is my final set og Gujju Poor Jokes and Smses for you all. Hope you all like it.

Why did the visitor to the Gujju home run away when was offered tea?
Bcoz the Gujju said he would serve snakes with it. (snacks)

What is a Gujju picnic called?
A snake in the grass.

Why did the American get scared of the Gujju?
Because he said 'Sue Kare chee.'

And last but not the least....

Why did Bill Clinton have the Gujju beaten up?
The Gujju told him, 'You are a very impotent man.'

If you have better Gujju Jokes/SMSes/Poor Jokes then these then do send them to us!!!! Or participate in the Submit your Joke Contest. See the Slider on the top of the Page for details!!!!!

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Gujju Jokes 3


As you all can see that I have started loving Gujju Jokes.. So here is another PJ dedicated to all Gujjus..

Why did the Gujju go to Rome?
To listen to Pop(e) music.

Bigg Boss 3 Contestants

Big Boss Season 3 is coming up again!!!! The show starts from Sunday October 4th 2009 on Colors. And with Amitabh Bachchan to replace Shilpa Shetty, the show surely shall have some good TRPs this time around!

Rumors are rife that this edition of Bigg Boss will have a lot of interesting personalities. Baba Ramdeo, Varun Gandhi, Vinod Kambli etc. are expected to participate this time.

The Poor Jokes team has done its own survey for Bog Boss Season 3 and has come up with the name of the probable contestants. In this exclusive report hacked from the big bos office , we came to know the qualifications seeked in a big boss contestant.
1. Contestant should have a track record of popping in media limelights often; he should however be unable to sustain the attention and then doom to solitude.
2. If the contestant is a male then he should be atleast married or a divorcee. Being married helps a man understand the virtue of being silent and hence his chances of survival in the show increases many folds.
3. If the contestant is a female then a past track record of affairs shall be taken into consideration. More the number of affairs, higher is the chance that the TRP of the show shall increase.
4. Contestants with certificates/copies of FIR, court case, conviction of Murder, Robbery, Bhaigiri, deportation shall be given preference.
5. A Male contestant with an eye for fellow males in the society and likewise shall get a higher preference.
6. If a contestant has a girlfriend or a boyfriend which possesses the qualities to qualify in big boss and are willing to exchange beds,kisses, bathroom soaps in the public, then they automatically qualify for Big Boss Season 3.
7. Successful but "Velle" (free) People have always have a higher chance of selection.
7. Other qualifying criteria include the ability to break out into impromptu dances any time, ability to shed glycerine tears without glycerine, ability to shout at the top of one's voice for hours.

Some people who could appear according to our survey are:
1. Shakti Kapoor. Aauu....
2. Gracy Singh. The lagaan fame girl
3. Chandra-Chud Singh. He was aishwaryas opposite in one movie .
4. Dhanraj Pillai. Succesful but vella
5. Shivraj Patil. Unsuccessful and vella
6. Greg Chappel. Ask Dada about him.

Do post your list of probable big boss contestants in the comments section.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Gujju Jokes



An Arab was admitted in the Lilavati Hospital at Mumbai for a heart transplant, but prior to the surgery the doctors needed to store his blood in case need arises.

As the gentleman had a rare type of blood, it couldn’t be found locally. So the call went out to a number of countries. Finally a Gujarati was located who had a similar type of blood.

The Gujarati willingly donated his blood for the Arab. After the surgery, the Arab sent the Gujarati as appreciation for giving his blood, a new Hummer, diamonds, lapiz lazuri jewellery, and a million US dollars.

Once again the Arab had to go through a corrective surgery. His doctor telephoned the Gujarati who was more than happy to donate his blood again.

After the second surgery, the Arab sent the Gujarati a thank you card and a jar of Almond halwa sweets. The Gujarati was shocked to see that the Arab this time did not reciprocate the Gujarati’s kind gesture as he had anticipated.

He phoned the Arab and asked him why he had expressed his appreciation in not so generous manner.

The Arab replied “Bapu…..now I have Gujju blood in my veins!”


That was just a joke I had found somewhere. But www.poorjokes.in is a website about poor jokes after all. So here is a Deadly PJ on Gujjus for you all!!!!!!!!!
Hope you all like it..

Why did the Gujju think the film Gandhi was about a woman?
Because Be(h)n Kingsley was in it.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Poor Jokes in Hindi (Navratri Special)



And as we bid good bye to Navratri this year, here is a tribute by www.poorjokes in.
We hope readers take the joke in the right spirit as it is merely a playful humor.

Agar koi Gujju Ladki Navratri mai Pregnant ho Jae to usey aap Kya kahenge????
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Nahi Pata??

She will be called
GARBA-vati.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Funny SMS Jokes (Cartoon) No 15


Here is the Latest SMS Joke from www.poorjokes.in. And as usual to add a little bit of fun , I have made this in a cartoon Format for you all as well. . Hope you all enjoy it . .
:-)

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The SMS Version

"What shall you find written on Mallika's Grave???
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"Pahli Baar Akele Soi Hai"

Personality Test!


Here you had a great chance to know about yourself. This test was devised by our very own Deadly Poor Jokes Team!!!!!!!
It tells about your personality just by your choice.

Imagine you walked into a small hut by the river in the jungle.

You pushed open the door, in front of you were 7 small beds to the right of the hut, and another 7 small chairs surrounding a small round table.

In the middle of the table is a food tray with 5 types of fruits in it.

They are:

a. Apple

b. Banana

c. Strawberry

d. Peach

e. Orange

Which fruit will u choose?Your choice reveals one aspect of your personality!

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Here are the results.

a. if you chosen apple: that means you are a person who loves to eat apple.

b. if you chosen banana: that means you are a person who loves to eat banana.

c. if you chosen strawberry: that means you are a person who loves to eat strawberry.

d. if you chosen peach: that means you are a person who loves to eat peach.

e. if you chosen orange: that means you are a person who loves to eat orange.



Ufff!!!!
Sorry!!!!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Funny SMS Jokes on Dussehra


On the occasion of Dussehra, the Poor Jokes team presents 2 100% original SMS PJs for you...
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Every dussehra day, in Ram Leela grounds around the country, actors dressed as Ram fire arrows at effegies of Ravan, post which the effigies catch fire. What song does everyone sing after that?
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Everyone sings the old Mika song, but with a twist..
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Everyone knows that Ravan had 10 heads. But recent research by the Poor Jokes team has found out that each of Ravan's 10 heads had a different name by itself. The names are as follws..
Ra-one
Ra-two
Ra-three
Ra-four
Ra-five
Ra-six
Ra-seven
Ra-Eight
Ra-Nine
Ra-ten !!
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© PoorJokes.in

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Santa Banta Joke No 14


Once Santa tells Banta, " Oye Yaar.. 2 din pahle mere saath tragedy ho gayi hoti.. Ye to Uparwale ka thankyou hai jo mai bach gaya"
Banta, " Aisa kya ho gaya tha tere saath???? "
Santa, " Mujhe Kobra ne Kaat liya tha!!!!"
Banta, " Kya baat kar raha hai!!!"
Santa, " Oye sach mai yaar!!!!
Banta, " Fir kya hua"
Santa, " Kya hona tha.. Mai bach gaya"
Banta, " Kyu Kobra zahreela nahi tha kya??"
Santa, " Bahot Zahreela tha"
Banta, " Fir kaise bach gaya?"
Santa, " Oye mai us waqt Living Room mai tha..."

Balle Balle
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