Politicians playing Cricket

After the General Elections and formation of Government, all the political leaders of the country have decided to take some time off. While the World Cup T20 is going on in England, our politicians too have decided to play a cricket match. They divided themselves into 2 teams:- The Ruling Coalition and The Opposition

After much deliberation about the playing eleven, the teams were formed as follows –

The Ruling Coalition

1. Sonia Gandhi – has decided to become the Non Playing Captain
2. Dr. Manmohan Singh – has been appointed the Vice Captain who would manage the players on field, based on the instructions received from the Non Playing Captain
3. Mamta Banerjee – has been made the Wicket Keeper, since she can stop anything, let alone a cricket ball (given her track record of bringing entire West Bengal to a standstill hundreds of times)
4. Pranab Mukherjee – has made the team as a Pinch Hitter, as he has expertise in bailing his party out of tight situations
5. A K Antony– has been made the opening batsman as he was expected to have a good defense (being a Defense Minister)
6. Shashi Tharoor – has been made the team's fast bowler, hoping that he can bowl as fast as he speaks English
7. Sharad Pawar has made a last minute entry into the team, after his attempts to form a new team under his captaincy failed.
   

Rahul Gandhi has refused to be a part of the team, and instead decided to scout for new talent so that he can build a strong team for the future.

M Karuna-nidhi could not be a part of the team due to health concerns, hence he has taken over the post of Coach. And by using Coach’s discretion, he has included 4 of his family members into the team (this despite strong opposition from the Non Playing Captain and Vice Captain).

The Opposition

1. L K Advani - has been chosen as the Captain because he is now getting used to the role of scrape-goat
2. Jayalalitha – has been chosen as the wicket-keeper since nothing can get past her.
3. Lalu Prasad Yadav - has been chosen exclusively chosen as a fielder so that he can display his sledging prowess on the ground. ( “Dhut.... Budhbak!!”)
4. Arun Jet-lee - has been chosen as the fast bowler. He is hopeful that with the initials "Lee" on the back of his T Shirt he shall bowl as well as his Australian counterpart Brett Lee.
5. Seeta Ram Yechuri - has also been chosen as a fielder only, who would always field at “Third” man.
6. Jaswant Singh - would be the Stand-In Runner in case any batsman gets injured, as he has expertise in escorting people (remember Kandh-har??)
7. Amar Singh - shall take the role of spinner. Just as he confuses the whole world about his political stands, he shall hopefully dupe the batsmen as well.
8. The one Seat reserved in the team according to the “Women’s Reservation Bill” has gone to Sushma Swaraj
   

Prakash Karat was invited to join the Opposition team, but is refused as he “ideologically” opposes a western game like Cricket. The only game he agrees to play is “Chinese” Checkers.

The Opposition team requested retired player Atal Bihari Vajpai to be their coach, as he has the only Captain under whom this team won a match many years ago. But Atal ji has refused the post by uttering his famous line “Aisi ghatiya players ke sath match khelna.. Achchi baat nahi hai!!”

The not so funny part is that the only eligible players in Parliament, Mohd Azharuddin and Navjot Sidhu, shall not be able to play because all positions in their respective teams have already been booked by others.

And last but not the least, Meira Kumar has been appointed as the nation’s 1st Dalit Woman Match referee.

© PoorJokes.in